Journey to Punctum

FESCH.TV INFORMIERT:

The intention of this punctum was a result of my increased search for freedom and space during the pandemic. Given that staying home was a difficult experience for me, I needed to get out and doing so in a safe and healthy way meant that I would drive to go on hikes or even just to take a nice drive in Silverado Canyon or to San Diego. These long drives made me reminisce on the road trips I would take with my family during my childhood, and after actually going on the same exact road trip as an adult I came to realize that the feelings were a result of the journey rather than the actual experience. While taking road trips on my own, I would experience these feelings that I did not quite understand or nail down, it was like an off-brand nostalgia that left me with a sense of action rather than a stillness. I realized the power and independence I felt on simply traversing hundreds of miles was overwhelming to me, the excitement of actually doing something and actually showing up was the fuel for this feeling. In addition to this, driving gave me a sense of control as if I could time travel, moving both physically and mentally, actively deciding when and where I can go, what memories I want to access and places I want to access. The joy of journey and active adventure was the punctum for me, and better understanding the source and meaning of my feelings from these drives.

I decided to use my personal videos to display the reality of how change is inevitable, and memories cannot be relived. By using actual video of the time which I felt nostalgic about, there is still this emptiness in them, showing how even returning physically to these same places will fail to return these feelings. Even though the places and the paths to get there stay relatively the same, it results in the wound of never being able to truly return because things will not be the same even though that is what they appear to be. Even the time traveling is merely a fallacy, a false perception further enhanced with included dates within the home videos. The unavoidable nostalgia of home videos is played in a pretty boring way, I chose uninteresting and almost awkward sections to show that reliving these moments play out more desirably in your mind and memories than in real life. I also included movies because they also portray this exaggerated and nostalgic perception of reality. American Graffiti in particular is entirely based on nostalgia, and is even more relevant for my purpose because it is a movie based on a tv show playing off of the desire to return to the 60’s. The punctum in general, garnering feelings and emotions as a result of adventure is a pretty cheesy thing. I wanted to emphasize this and recognize that my life is not as idealistic and glamorous as a movie. This video end as a movie trailer, as if even this punctum is only a movie, a real feeling but nothing more than that.

Credits:
Video:
American Graffiti Trailer –
Ride Along with Scott –
Back to the Future Clip –

Audio:
21 Days Under the Sky Trailer –